Monday, September 30, 2013

The next phase.

It has now been almost two months since I turned in my keys and left GMC for the last time as a staff member. It has been almost two months since I started working at a local pizza place. It has been almost two months since this "next phase" began.

I've been struggling to figure out how I feel about my job since before my first day of work. I make minimum wage. I work about 30 hours each week. I close the store two or three nights each week. Sometimes it's crazy busy and I love it. Sometimes it's super slow and I love it. Sometimes I hate both extremes. Sometimes I enjoy working with everyone, and sometimes I can't wait to send people home. Sometimes I feel like I'm finally settling in and getting used to everything, and the next moment I'm totally overwhelmed and feel like I'm falling apart.

And then my dad said "You're helping teens figure out how to live their lives. You're funding your work at East of Chicago."
It's the answer I want to be able to give. It's the perspective I want to have. It's what I need to convince myself of.

I don't want to be ashamed of making minimum wage. I don't want to feel like I'm wasting my degree or the time and money I spent earning it. Because I'm not. I know what I want to do, and I'm in a period of waiting. I have loans to pay back. I have some growing up to do. I need to learn more about ministry and people and the "real world" and me.

I work at East of Chicago Pizza Company. I teach 7th grade Sunday School at GMC. I co-lead the 7th grade girls Break Out Group. I volunteer with Leo Campus Life.
I don't have much of a social life, which is something I need to work on.
I live with my parents, because I would rather be helping to pay off loans than paying rent.

I'm not sure what I'd rather be doing right now. I'm feeling just fine with what is going on in my life.

And you know what? It's my life. I get to decide how I feel about it. And I choose to be okay with it. I choose to be okay with making minimum wage and living with my parents. I choose to enjoy my job and to love my co-workers.

That's one version of a life update.